New Security Theory

For ages, Americans have fought to reconcile their love of representative governance with their loathing of their elected representatives. Samuel Longhorne Clemens, better known as Mark Twain, wrote in the 1800s that America had no distinctly native criminal class except Congress. Congress' repute hasn't improved much since, though it has voted itself significant increases in income.

Perhaps politicians can provide a valuable service to the nation, after all. In this era of asymmetric warfare and media manilupation, perhaps the same characteristics that make politicians so loathsome to Americans who must live with the results of their decisions may offer some valuable contribution against modern national threats.

The Jaded Consumer offers a modest proposal. Rather than keep politicians "safely" at home in the United States where they are apt to pass absurd laws that lower the quality of life for Americans, we should consider sending them abroad to talk our enemies to death. In a place with less ubiquitous access to health care, a stopped heart would surely kill.

Let's not waste time. Let's identify the politicians best able to so serve their nation and arrange an itinerary. The world is full of possibility.